Bright Sunshiny Day

Not too long ago....

I had lunch with a friend.

This is unusual because:

1. I had no children with me and it was the middle of the week.

 2. It was as if I was sitting across from myself.

 The girl I was ten or so years ago. Have you ever met yourself coming and going? Not in the frenzied, "where did I put my keys and why I am trying to leave anyway?!" kinda way...but in the way that screams "Do you REMEMBER THAT GIRL?" And you know, God is so gracious to me, because I do remember that girl! And as I sat across from my precious friend I just nodded my head and said, "Oh. Yes. I remember." And I 'm glad I do. Because God knew what he was doing when I walked the same road she has found herself on. And He knew that I would need to remember. For my friend. Life throws us into a direction that we would not have chosen for ourselves. Most of the time. But along the way, God gently leads us to those who can comfort and those who need comfort.

Girl, I've got your back.

And I'm so glad you eat ranch with your chips and salsa.

Just a Smidge Perturbed...or Maybe Just Plain Ol' ANGRY

Here goes.  You may want to scoot a back from the screen....I'm about TO YELL LOUDLY.

And I really don't get to worked up.  Much.  But this is DIFFERENT.

I am sitting in the study blogging.  It's 11:15.  I should be asleep.  However, while I am sitting in the study blogging my husband is outside on the front porch talking to some police officers, a whole firetruck full of firemen and waiting on an investigator.

Why?  You wanna know WHY?

Because since December we have had our Frosty the Snowman popped by baseball bats, a bee-bee gun has shot through the window above our front door leaving a nice bullet hole and (stand back - here comes the shouting again....)

Last friday night two "bombs"  one right after the other expolded in two of our front flower beds. Sounded like two gunshots.  I thought for sure someone on the street behind us was laying shot in their house....it was so LOUD and so close.  I didn't sleep for the rest of the night.....the next day we found the remnants of the "bombs" in our yard.  Killed some of my plants.  After we figured out that the gunshots were really these bomb thingys and IN OUR YARD - we called the police.

And just about forty five minutes ago - Hubs is in the shower, kids are all tucked in and I just crawled in bed and guess what? BOOOM!

Anohter bomb....this time thrown right up against OUR FRONT DOOR.

What the heck?

Neighbors come pouring out and there I am in my pj's peering out the front door scared to come out.  My across the street neighbor comes running and hollaring to call the police and while I'm standing there shaking like a stick he stands guard while I get Andy. 

Yep.  I am so mad.  Frustrated mad.  Ebby Halliday here we come.  This is just crap.  

And The Two Shall Become One?

We've got issuses.

On top of that....we've got a dog (puppy) with issues.

A Golden Retriever with an aggression problem.

*sigh*

We've not given up hope - yet.  However, in MY opinion.....ONE dog  fight is one too many.  And we've had several more than one dog fight.

We'll see.  For now, the kids can't go in the backyard at doggie dinner time....and have strict instructions to head for the playground if the dog goes trolling for trouble.  Thankfully, she only shows her nasty side to her sister....

What gives?

The next thing is getting them fixed and continue our *intensive* behavior training....but if it continues, she is headed back to the breeder.

Whatever.

Desperation

Yep. That's the only word for it when it's beautiful outside, things are blooming, puppies are digging....and here I sit. On the inside, listening to Super Bubbie nap all the while blogging from my blackberry thingamajig. Our desktop died (well, it got killed and thank you God, I wasn't the one who killed it!) My laptop died an eerily similar death, and all the while our DSL privider (SBC)has been giving us fits since december.

So DSL problems + dead computer = no blogging.

I can still get email on my phone, so throw me something! Desperate times, people.

Oh. But wait. Its even worse than no computer. In the slow death of the desktop it took all our pics with it!

All our pics!!!

Andy tried to think of something nice to say, you know since he *might* have been the one who killed it.

"I think our last back up was only two years ago, so we'll still have some pictures"

It was then that I meekly and quietly reminded him that we are parents of a child that is just two years old....

However, I am happy to report that three weeks later and a few dollars poorer, we do indeed have all our pics back. My reaccurring nightmare of never, ever seeing again just how beautiful was after giving birth to a ten pound baby has been laid to rest.

And I can't believe that I just typed this whole thing on this tiny lil keyboard.

Not a New Year's Resolution Blog

Tonight while I was cleaning up the kitchen after a yummy dinner - dropped off by the most precious lady - a song called "Right Where You're Supposed to Be" by Jadon Lavik rolled over on the ol IPOD.  Have you heard it?  No?  Well here you go...you must read the lyrics. 

Look around what could I do
This place is unfamiliar and new
So I  try to look beyond what's right in front of me
Hope to be found how could this be true
Comfort came and left in such a hurry
So then what's on the other side of this tragedy

You wake up to find that you're right where supposed to be
Trapped in uncertainty each day's a mystery
You wake up to find that you're right where you're supposed to be
The past is unveiled and you see you're right where you're meant to be

Look behind oh how we've grown
All the places we've been
The places I'll never never go back again
If I had only known that all was not lost
It always comes around again round again round again
Patiently waiting just waiting

til one day you find that you're right where supposed to be
Trapped in uncertainty each day's a mystery
You wake up to find that you're right where you're supposed to be
The past is unveiled and you see you're right where you're meant to be

Now I see the reasons for all of those seasons wondering just how my life would connect
My life would connect but you knew all along all along

You wake up to find that you're right where you're supposed to be
Your heart's running wild and free each day's a mystery

You wake up to find that you're right where you're supposed to be
Trapped in uncertainty each day's a mystery
You wake up to find that you're right where you're supposed to be
The past is unveiled and you see you're right where you're meant to be

You see...today, tonight I find myself right where I'm supposed to be.  Notice I said, supposed to be.  Not necessarily where I'd choose to be.  HUGE difference.    Three weeks ago, there was a little glimmer of hope that a sweet surprise might just pay us a visit in a few months.  Or nine.  Over the last weeks, our surprise has tried to slip away a few times, but is still hanging on.  And so we wait.  And pray.

And we know beyond a shadow of a doubt that we are right were we are supposed to be.

Attention Please!

This post is directed to the CREEPS who took a baseball bat to our Frosty the Snowman's head last night.

You suck.

However, as much as you suck, you cannot steal our joy...you can make our children cry, but we can turn those tears into a lesson on how the thief comes to destroy, but Jesus is good all the time and will never, NEVER leave us and guess what?  The tears dried up.

So you see, it didn't take you long to pop our Frosty, we know because we heard your sorry self in our yard...but the lesson you provided my kids will last a lifetime.

As much as I still think you suck.  I must thank you.

(grrrrr)

The One That I Didn't Want To Write...

Just in case you were wondering....it hasn't been pretty around around here.  Bright Sunshiny Day! Land hasn't been pretty in a while.

It's been downright cloudy.  Stormy.  Unpleasant.

Yes.  The silence in the ol blog is telling, eh?  Because if I don't have great! fun! things to say, then I'll just cease and desist with the blogging.  This is my blog after all,  and since I never asked my family if they cared  should I decide to hang out all our dirty laundry....I'm not gonna do it.

I will, however, share mine.

It has been brought to my attention that I have begun to see certain people in my life as a hindrance, inconvenience, or shall we say royal over the last month.  Or two.  We might even go ahead and say three.  And the more irritated I became the more irritating the royal pain(s) became.

Like I said, not pretty.

Storms brewed and wars have been fought.  None of us won, however, we did survive. And that survival is what I have decided to call "The Gift".

The Gift was presented to us for the billionth time over the weekend.  This Gift is the Gift that keeps on giving and I've already opened it a thousand times today.  It's called Grace.   And I am so thankful for it.   Friday and Saturday, we claimed our Gift at a conference featuring Dr's. Tedd and Paul Tripp.  Brothers. Pastors.  Our thinking was shifted, our hearts softened and our apologies spoken.  We asked for and received forgiveness.

As time marches on, I hope to share more about what has gone on here and what we've learned.  These terrible but wonderful lessons MUST be shared.

Changes

I know that I am not spouting out anything that isn't a well known fact about myself.  Surely you know by now that change....any kind of change....is hard for me. So hard in fact that I'll go to great lengths to avoid significant changes.

Unless.

Unless I know that I know that I know that it's time.  It's past time.  And it's the right thing to do.  And when it has been quietly staring you in the face for two years, eventually you get it...and realize that something has to be done.

Like I said, it's hard.  But also necessary.  For growth.  If we didn't grow and change, then we'd all be the same.  Like I said in my Noah posts recently (scroll down a bit to find it) I'm not the same.  None of us are.  And with all these inside changes going on, some outside changes were bound to take place.

One major outside change for us is the decision to leave our church. I hesitate to even call it our 'church home' simply because it hasn't felt like home in a really. long. time.  Six years we've invested...and honestly for a long time it felt like giving up to just walk away.  Most of it is personal.  Some of it is painful. But when it's time to go...well....it's time to go.  I've learned that somethings you just outgrow - no matter how much to try to squeeze back into them.  (ain't that the truth?!)

We are leaving a few friends behind and of course that is the hardest part.  For the last two months, I've prayed that the relationships that God has ordained for our lives - and theirs - will continue to grow, even though - and perhaps because of - the fact that we worship in different places. 

And on that note, we are excited about our new adventure!  New opportunites to seek God's face in a completely different way.  A new place to put down some roots and maybe even one day call it home.

A Different Drummer...

Noah.

He did things a little differently.  Remember he was the one who built the ark in obedience to God.  Only he was building the ark at a time when there had never been a rainstorm.  Not even a tiny sprinkle.  Yet he persevered.  You see, he was doing what he knew to be right.  Followed his convictions.  Right. True. A little different.  Strange even. I doubt he really understood what the boat was for.  He had no concept of what the word "flood" meant.

I get Noah.  And I really like him.

He forged on... For the sake of obedience.  For the sake of his family. 

Have you ever felt like Noah? I have.  I do.  Over the last two years, things in Bright Sunshiny Day Land have changed dramatically.

We added one funny little guy.  He shows us all what living for the moment means. We  opened up Bright Sunshiny Homeschool three days a week.  We halted a lot of our outside activities.  We changed the way we attend worship and church activities.  There has been an overwhelming urge to tuck our chicks in a little closer to the nest.  Gird up the foundation of how great it is to be a child of God.  Protect our children from "black swarmy dreams" and other things that threaten their fragile security. But most of all we strive to find joy in being a family!  We want our littles to know who they are in Christ.  Their valuable place in our family. To enjoy each other.

This is it folks.  We don't get do-overs in raising our families.  I don't want to miss a second of it.

When my kids learn more and more about the greatness of God, guess what?  I want to be there. When they finally grasp the need to write neatly...I want to be there.  When they settle in to read out loud, I want to be the one listening.  Or when they learn Scripture, Bible Stories or praise songs.  It's my calling.  No denying it.  My job, Andy's job....not the church, Sunday school teacher or school.

Everyday I feel more and more like Noah.  Building and searching.  Obeying and providing security for my littles.  Searching for what's right.  Dodging the flaming arrows and prickly words.

I get it.  I'm different.  But I'm doing the best I can.  I'm praying, seeking and searching for the right way....and hearing the still small voice that says, "this is the way....walk in it."

And guess what?  We like us.  We are happy.  We find comfort and joy in being together!  Call us crazy (and some do!) but isn't that what a family is?!

ps Go read Kris!  She has a wonderful blog today.

Happy Valentines Day!

But it ain't  right.

No, it ain't right at all when your Valentine is stuck in NYC with nary an end in sight.  Two airports, several attempts at flights, lots of grumpy people, an interesting variety of show dogs leftover from the big dog show last night in the city and two train rides to D.C. with hopes for a flight tomorrow. 

Here at home we have two, no three sniffle-filled children, and tons of Hershey's kisses.

Harumpf.

And I only consumed two kisses while slumping through this post.